I Didn’t Make the Fucking Rules

“Excuse me. Can I exchange this?” A guy says to me, holding out a rotting avocado he’d cut a wedge out of.

“Sure, sir,” I began, “Just go to customer service, show them your receipt, and they’ll refund you.”

“No, no, I don’t want my money back, I want to exchange it.” He persisted.

“OK, sure! Grab an avocado and take it to customer service, show them your receipt, they’ll set you up.”

He furrowed his brow, “Well I don’t have a receipt.”

“Do you have a club card?”

“NO.” Now raising his voice slightly.

“Look, I’m sorry, I don’t think there’s very much we can do for you.”

“Why the hell can’t I just exchange it?”

“Cause that’s not how it works…everywhere. For all I know you you dug that out of a garbage can off the street.”

“I’m going to talk to a manager.”

“About what? A manager’s not going to be able to help you. We can’t just give people stuff for walking in the store and making demands.”

He looks at my name-badge and asks, “What’s your name?” I tell him and he starts to walk away.

“You’re going to file a complaint because I told you how things are?”

He just walks off in silence.

All you crazy assholes who want to start shit because you think an avocado has an indefinite lifespan–you’re stupid. And all your bullshit “complaints” get filled in a special bin right under the counter labeled “Recycling”.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s